But why ...

... is growth ... painful?

the place where all knowledge is kept

The first thing that I always do when we land in our new "from here now" is obtain a library card. Most libraries provide a short-term card for non-residents, and so, until we have our permanent address here, I signed up for a non-resident card that I will renew as a resident card once we sign our lease!

Here in Honolulu, the library system charges $25 for a five-year non-resident card and $10 for a three-month non-resident card. For residents, like in all places, the library is free to use for residents. 

Upon obtaining my three-month non-resident card, I checked out five books for myself, and I let the bodybuddy/lifemate check out two books on my account :)

Happy Reading! 

Nocturnal Test Run w/ sushi, snacks, a soda, &a sunrise

2023 April Reads

 Year Goal: 14/53

12. A Quantum Life: My unlikely journey from the street to the stars by Hakeem Oluseyi [must read]

Nonfiction | 520.92 OLU | 2022 | 342 pages

"In the center of the curve are the vast majority of people. They're indifferent. Apathetic. They're thinking of themselves. Then there is a small minority of people who will extend a helping hand to you. They will work with you, share resources with you. And there's another small minority that is going to be hostile to you. Don't let that small group of doubters derail you." —Art Walker p 319 

 

13. Black Magic: Religion and the African American Conjuring Tradition by Yvonne Patricia Chireau

Nonfiction | BR563.N4 C5 | 2003 | 234 pages

14. Journal Articles

• "On the Dangers of Stochastic Parrots: Can Language Models Be Too Big?" 

authors Emily M. Bender and Timnit Gebru

• "Gender Shades: Intersectional Accuracy Disparities in Commercial Gender Classification" 

authors Joy Buolamwini and Timnit Gebru

• "Between the Worlds of the Colonizer and the Conjure Woman" 

author alecia deon 

QED: A Journal in GLBTQ Worldmaking, Michigan State University Press, Volume 6, Number 3, Fall 2019, pp. 143-148

 

First Meal | 비빔밥 w/ 물냉면

(don't mind the time stamp; it is only relatively correct)

MOVING DAY PART TWO | Alaska Lounge + SEA > HNL

 

ima gif! refresh if i look like a still :)

MOVING DAY PART ONE | Bolt > FF1 > A Line + DIA > SEA

a walk + a flower field

... "but, Ladybug ..."

"No butts, Lingerer. Do not wallow in the past where your failures reside. Make your fails your friends who will teach you and guide you so that you are not alone on your journey. Press on! Into the future and smile for the moment when you will finally succeed," Ladybug demands. 

The cat turns about itself, stands for a moment, then finally sits itself into a little loaf, "But, Ladyb ..."

"No butts, Lingerer. Your future cannot unfold without you," Ladybug reminds. 

"But, Ladybug!" the Lingerer, standing now, is finally able to shout aloud.

Ladybug buzzes and lands on the tip of the cat's nose, arms akimbo, taunting. 

"Bu, but, Ladybug. I'm sad," the Lingerer whimpers, barely audible.

"Oh," Ladybug relaxes and slumps onto its haunches as the cat sits back, eyes closed, nose pointing to the ground. 

After a moment of sitting, understanding, Ladybug suggests, "There's a flower field not too far from here. I visit it all the time to see my favorite blooms and my favorite friends. Wanna go for a walk?"

The cat stands and flicks Ladybug up off its nose and onto the top of its head, "Yes." 

in my nonfiction life, i received this bouquet of "we'll miss you" flowers
&a carrot cake from my manager and coworker yesterday,
bc we (the bodybuddy/lifemate and i) are embarking on
the next chapter of our lives with a relocation to the State of Hawai'i, USA

when i identified as a 'vegetarian' (during my experimental college years) i scoured cookbooks&magazines for recipes that were veg-friendly, &i found this recipe in some magazine that I cannot remember now, so I apologize that I cannot give credit where credit is due, nevertheless, I subbed veg-sausage back in the day, &the recipe became my fave pasta dish; this version, however, I made with a meat sausage

Sausage (meat or meatless is great, but it definitely needs to be a form of sausage) 
& Goat Cheese Penne

Non-Food Stuff:

large skillet or caste iron pan

large pot to boil pasta

some type of large spatula (for mixing in the large skillet)

some type of large spoon (for stirring in the large pot)

Food-Stuff:

one large yellow onion
one small bulb of garlic (or about 10 peeled pieces)

2 pounds of roma tomatoes or 16 oz can of diced tomatoes (juice drained)

sausage to taste (get as much or as little as you want to eat)

a tube chunk of goat cheese

half of one cup of olive oil (or vegetable or canola is fine) + one splash of oil for the pasta water

one pound box of penne pasta

salt & fresh cracked pepper 
a smattering of spices (onion powder, garlic powder, basil, oregano)
splash of soy sauce

bread (fresh french loaf is ideal, any type of bread-like eats is fine)

Cook Time: about 90 minutes

the doing of it ...

first, fill the large pot with water enough to cook the box of penne pasta (there are instructions on the box) and set the pot on the stove over HIGH heat, drop in about two big spoonfuls of salt and the splash of oil (whatever kind you have is great, olive oil is ideal for this recipe) 

once the water is set up, set your skillet on another burner and turn to MEDIUM LOW heat (if your stove top range has a nob to adjust the temperature, and the nob is a clock, you want to set the temperature to about 9 o'clock) and pour the half cup of oil into the pan

while the skillet is warming, slice the pointy top off your onion and then slice your onion in half from pointy top to pubey bottom, peel away the papery skin until you reach skinny white succulence, lay one half of the onion down on its flat already cut side, and slice into thin half circles (I typically go for about an eighth of an inch, but not paper thin), then slice up the other half of onion

once the onion is prepared, throw the onion into the skillet

if your pasta waster begins to boil at any point, turn the heat off, put a lid on the pot and let it sit until we're ready to make the pasta

stir the onions around in the oil, turn the heat up to MEDIUM heat (about 6 o'clock), hot enough to sizzle but not crackle 

as the onions cook down, peel and chop your garlic and set aside

you can also open your can of tomatoes (the original recipe I learned was for fresh roma tomatoes, but I find that demanding that ingredient can be a bit pretentious, and I think that canned tomatoes work really well in this dish because the recipe demands time to break down the tomatoes, and so, there's time to work out the canniness of canned tomatoes, etc.)

once the onions begin to smell (when the smell fills the entirety of your living space) turn the heat up a notch above medium (around 7 o'clock) at this point, you need to watch your onions, stir them often, but you also want them to "give up" so let them go on the heat for a few minutes at a time, and then, suddenly, the smell of the onions will become pleasant (I find that this can take up to twenty minutes, cause the temperature needs to be low enough that the onions don't burn) and they will begin to change color, darken

at this moment, add a healthy pinch or two of salt and scoop in the garlic 

give the onion and garlic a stir and let simmer for only about five minutes

add the tomatoes and stir again

add the smattering of spices (about a teaspoon of each) and the splash of soy sauce and stir again

turn the heat up to MEDIUM HIGH (about 3 o'clock) until the sauce begins to bubble and then turn the heat down to MEDIUM (about 6 o'clock) for the remainder of the simmering time

after the sauce has been simmering for about ten minutes, return the pot full of water for the pasta to HIGH heat 

once the pasta water begins to boil, dump in your box of penne and set a timer for however much time is instructed on the box

after the pasta has been boiling for about a minute or two, give the pasta a stir

while the pasta is cooking, slice up your sausage and throw it into the sauce, let the sauce continue to simmer until the pasta is fully cooked

once your pasta timer has gone off, drain the pasta and then dump the pasta into the skillet with the sauce

mix the pasta well into the sauce

scoop a serving of pasta into a bowl

crumble the goat cheese chunk over the pasta 

drizzle a bit of olive oil over the top, crack a little fresh black pepper

serve hot with bread and enjoy!

[i made this version brunch style with a biscuit and fried egg]

&upon waking, i know where it is i need to go, what it is i need to do

i have to be really well rested in order to reach out to my dreams 

when they reach out to me during that just-as-i-lose-consciousness state before a nap but, like i said, 

not in need of a nap. 

for it is within that moment, 

that moment of slipping consciousnesses, from conscious consciousness to unconscious consciousness, etc., 

a moment of psychological, what's the word, because i do not wish to attach any form of negative connotation to the process, but so, like, perhaps, something like, instability?, 

wherein my mind is not as sharp, 

and thus, 

my deep, interior subconscious mind can reach out, 

for that fragile moment in time, 

that tiny opening in space, 

and i can see myself, clearly but for a moment,

a single photon hitting my consciousness.