04 October 2025

EPHWHYELL | Vol 0.1 [UPDATED 17jan26]

[UPDATE] 17jan26

Sooooo, I recently turned forty, and yes, it was a big deal, becauwoose, everyone doesn't make it to forty, and a lot of people won't make it to whatever age I survive til, and I will only survive to the age of my inevitable death, nevertheless, forty has been different, and I think the most-obvious difference is that my physical body feels older, now, and it never used to feel "old," and I don't really know how to describe it, except to say that, when I was "young"-er, I never really noticed my body; I've always been present in my body, etc., but my body never hurt in a way to draw attention to itself, aside from the few times I've been injured, but omg, I am veering further and further away from my goal with this update, goddamn.

Ultimately, my point is that the whole point of this thing, EPHWHYELL, was to discover what it is that it is, you know? Maybe you don't know cause you've never tried to bring to life that which does not yet exist, but when bringing to life that which does not yet exist, a lot of things will flux and flow and change and grow, etc., etc., &c., and then, pruning. 

&The entire purpose of Vol 0.1 is to discover, whittle, concentrate what it is that I want to build into something that I actually want to do/spend my time doing, and where we are now is the place where things have begun to condense, and so the whole purpose of this thing has revealed itself, and now, we must steer this thing toward the thing it will be.

In essence, I have had the lifelong dream of being a fashion designer, but "fashion designer" is not a label that ever seemed to fit me, for many reasons, two of them being:

  1. It seemed silly, when I was in school to become a doctor, to quit to become a fashion designer? BAHAHAHAHAHA! How fucking sad that this is how I thought, right?
  2. Literally, the label "fashion designer" does not fit what I aspire to be, and so, since I couldn't find the thing that I want to be, with regards to designing clothes, etc., it has taken me awhile to really hammer down exactly who I am, as a designer/maker of clothes, etc.
But now I know, and I know exactly what to call myself, in so many words, but I have yet to come up with my own word for myself, and so, until that time, you'll just have to think of me as a "fashion designer," and with this new compass heading, I will overhaul findyummylovedotcom to reflect this new, True direction for EPHWHYELL, and I couldn't be more excited about being forty and opening this chapter of my life as I finally pursue my DREAM *yum*

선 the Sailor and Tiffany the Tailor, lol.

If you're following along/doing along with me, this will probably be the final update on this post until I relaunch findyummylovedotcom in its Vol 0.2 phase *yippie* But the reality is that I will most-likely post a whole new post here on tkscmdotcom about Vol 0.2 when fyldotcom is up and running. 

For now, the site is still what it has been, and then it will be "under construction." 

In the meantime, I already know that I want to continue Writing Practitioners, etc., and so, the Prompts Page will continue to be updated during this build-out time, and then, eventually, EVERYTHING (다!) EPHWHYELL will be on fyldotcom, and only the writing-related things will be posted here on tkscmdotcom *sigh*

Until then ...



[End Update]

^..^



Read about "The Why" (recommended ;), and bookmark this post so that you can easily refer to it as you build with me over the next decade as we bring into reality that which, currently, only exists in our minds.





Landing [uploaded 10Oct25]

see first drafts here







PHILOSOPHICAL FOCUS | NOODIVERSITY &FREEDOM

i encountered this concept, noodiversity, for the first time a few weeks ago while reading an article in the September ARTFORM. thus, this is a new philosophical concept for me, and i would like to understand it more fully. 



NOODIVERSITY, according to and coined by Yuk Hui, is what he calls, "our way of understanding our relation to the environment, which varies from one locality to another and is embedded in language, customs, and so on." [p122] The concept context is accompanied by two other concepts: technodiversity and biodiversity.

&FREEDOM, feels pretty self-explanatory as a focus for thought-work during these oh-so-current times *sigh*





FIND | Fitness 

i am returning to yoga, for the general well-being of my body. since we do not want to shell out cash, at this time, for a gym or studio membership where i can dance, i have decided to return to yoga in order to find some more fitness. i have been running moderately, and i will also continue to do that.

October Focus :: Urdhva Mukha Svanasana &Keep on Running
stretch every day, anything between small and large stretches counts
small = Surya Namaskar a minimum of five
large = warmed up all the way to Urdhva Dhanurasana
  • saw this NPC doing yoga --> Chaturanga Dandasana + Utthita Vasisthasana flow <-- while playing Borderlands 4


November Focus :: Urdhva Dhanurasana &Keep on Running
stretch every other day, anything between small and large stretches counts
small = Surya Namaskar a minimum of six
large = warmed up all the way to Vasisthasana





December Focus :: Bālāsana &Run MORE
no stretch goal; will stretch as often as i can, however
Run, at minimum, once a week; start some conditioning (get back to it) for 2026!
[remember, i job a fucking full-time job, on my feet, &i walk two miles, round trip, to get there]







FIND | Imagery






YUMMY | Cook once a week

  • you have a bit more energy these days, so why not help out the bodybuddy/lifemate and conceive of and cook one meal each week in October (we'll assess the situation each month)
  • this is a whole thing that needs a complete revamp
  • [05dec] i'm thinking something like a recipe, as opposed to some arbitrary amount of cooking






YUMMY | [sex]

  • do with it what you will
  • not gonna share the specifics *wink wink*






YUMMY | Money
  • presented by tkscm, limited
  • [05dec] has been shelved, for now, cause the bb/lm is undergoing "change"





LOVE | Reading






LOVE | Writing 

  • write at least one nonfiction piece with the Philosophical Focus in mind
  • write at least one fiction piece with the Philosophical Focus in mind
  • write one card/letter to someone, and send it to them [some inspo]
  • complete (at least) two writing dates
    • writing practitioners Speed Sketching + Subject Sketching on Philosophical Focus
      • find prompts here if/when you are ready to write your Sketches (or have a friend write you prompts!); it's best that you do not look at the prompts until just before you do your Speed or Subject Sketching! for it is the challenge of a thing that we LOVE.
      • read 선의 sketches [speed]
      • read 선의 sketches [subject]





LOVE | Drawing

  • if you haven't figured out that Book Three is a graphic novel, well, now you know, so it'd be nice to start getting some imagery going for the thing, etc.
  • i actually do not enjoy drawing all that much; it is my least-favorite apparatus(? whatever), but i do enjoy the end-result after i spend time drawing, etc.
  • [05dec] this looks like it will need to be revamped, too *sigh*





&FINALLY | Do I need anything to accomplish these exercises?

  • sketchbook ✔
  • touchscreen stylus (i had one, but we cannot find it!)
  • mead, spiral, college-ruled notebook ✔ 



&THEN | you use the surge of excitement and get started, right away! if you feel the pangs, don't push it off or "save it" ... use the momentum! go, go, go! 


\\//.
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