Taking Inventory | 2024 in 'Beauty' as one who is often, 'not here, right now,' etc.

So, I've never been one to wear makeup, but I'm no Luddite. There was a time when I thoroughly enjoyed the beauty videos made by the beautiful Korean-American YouTubers I enjoyed. I had never seen myself as beautiful, but watching these videos being made by fellow Korean-Americans (one's even an adoptee!), I finally started to enjoy my own face. 

Nevertheless, I still don't care for makeup, but I like the idea of a beauty GRWM-esque video, so I'm doing a version of that by taking inventory of my current "beauty" routine, which is actually more like a basic hygiene routine with a bit o' spritz.

Also, we've lived in six cities in the past ten years (eight cities since we got together), so my entire mentality behind my beauty routine has been revolving more and more heavily around portability. If it can't fly, I can't buy. Obviously, if I'm going to be someplace for a big-bottle's amount of time, then the bigger the bottle, the better the deal. 

First up, my basic hygiene routine ::

from top left to right
towel loofah (asian style)
Dr. Bronner's (the bodybuddy/lifemate wondered his whole life why his skin hated fossil-fuel based soap,
and so, we've been using all-natural soap for a long time now)
Cetaphil Daily Facial Cleanser (a 100% loyal user since 2015,
i start to panic if i can't find it in whatever city/country we're in now)
shampoo (no brand loyalty, i literally walk into walmart [or its foreign counterpart],
and which ever ones are the next price up from the bottom,
i choose among that price point)
contact solution (no brand loyalty, same sort of pricing mentality,
except in the case of walmart, they've secured both the bottom most
and second next floor price point with their own in-house Equate brand of contact solution, respect)
whatever contact case comes free with the bottle of solution
deodorant (no brand loyalty, the same pricing method applies here as with shampoo)
bath salts/soaps (no brand loyalty, one step up from the cheapest for this sorta thing, too,
all-natural, a must.)
Crest Baking Soda & Peroxide Whitening With Tartar Protection Fresh Mint
(100% brand loyalty, i become upset when we have to use a different kind of toothpaste,
even if its only for one tube's amount!)
toothbrushes (no brand loyalty, whatever is the best deal, &soft for fuck's sake).

I wash my face every morning when I wake up, and in the shower at the end of my day, when I know I'm not going to go outside again. I brush my teeth every morning as the last thing I do before leaving the house and as the last thing I do before I go to bed. I rub a stick of plain old deodorant (i know about yea, all natural whatnot. i just, i know!) under each arm pit every morning. Most days I bathe in an Epsom salt bath at the end of my day, and when I shower, I scrub with a towel loofah and an all-natural soap. 

My scent game is as follows ::

from left to right
Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue Eau De Toilette 50 ml
Chasing Fireflies by Bath & Body Works Fine Fragrance Mist 75 ml

When I was in high school, I think that I wore either some Vicki's or Bath & Body Works body spray. Nothing fancy. While living in Syracuse, NY, during a year-long break I needed during college, I danced every day, jobbed a few days a week (in a mall!) for $7.12/hr (i think, don't quote the exact amount, it was somewhere around there), and lived on my own in a woman's house from whom I rented a room for a flat $300/month. I sold my old 1995 Mazda 626 in Colorado for $3,000 and put that money down on a 2004 Blue New Beetle in New York, for $5,000. It was my first "new" car, and I made $125 ($105? somewhere between $105 and $125 *eyeroll*) payments each month for five years to pay off the first loan ($2,000) I had ever taken on all by myself*. Paying that baby off with a perfect payment history was one of the highlights of my financial life, thus far. It was awesome, and it was during this time in Syracuse that I discovered Dolce & Gabbana's Light Blue. I will literally cry the day this scent is discontinued. I also picked up a body spray on my birthday from ... Bath & Body Works, lol, for jobbing. It's a much louder (&cheaper) scent, so I can really over-dose on it, and bother everyone with my spritz. Deal with it.

Finally, my makeup routine ::

currently
some Rocky Ford Raspberry LIP BALM 
Rocky Mountain Fresh
Hand Churned + Hand Poured
Soothing Butters For Your Kisser
Colorado Collection
rockymountainsoapmarket.com

I used to have eyeliner and blush, but neither of those things made it during the "did i even use it once last year? if not, i'm throwing it out," new year routine of 2015. And so, now the entirety of my "beauty" routine has devolved into lip balm, and I'm not even loyal to any particular type of lip balm. I, obviously, went through my Burt's Bees phase, but once it got bought, I quit that shit. Then it took me a long time to find a new lip balm to which to pledge my allegiance, and I am still on the hunt. Plus, I'm cheaper than ever, so lately, I've been sticking to whatever lip balm is swag &or easily lifted by a five-finger discount, etc., jk, *ah hem*

And there you have it. 

To, 2024! So much and more!

*I sold that car to my adopted dad (he had the original version back in the day, in blue, lol) for $3,000 in 2013 cause we were moving to South Korea, and he wanted my car. He wanted to drive around in it and be happy. &that $3,000 covered all of the consumer debt we had and the expenses of our 2013 move so that we arrived in South Korea with only student loan debt. &we've been free of consumer debt, ever since.

Maybe it's Whiteness | on Barbie, the movie, and its creator, a Fraud.

So...

I definitely did NOT want to write about this, but since I'ma writer, I don't necessarily have complete control over what I do and do not write. If writing does not make you feel alive, please do not comment. You haven't the right.

The problem is that Barbie, the movie, is (had been, depending on *when* you are) dominating the internet news cycle, and I could not escape it, even on Threads, the social media app. Naturally, I started to think about it, cause I will admit that the movie was well-made. As a big-budget production, it is a good movie. Whatever about the story, for now. Gerwig is obviously more than capable of putting together an enormous film production. Bravo. The problem(s), for me, arose when the narrative around the Oscars, entertainment's Patriarchal Flagship, began to revolve around Barbie being "wrongfully" labelled as an adapted screenplay and being "snubbed." 

Then Whoopi said the incredible thing, "Everybody doesn't win." [clap. clap. clap.]

And then, I was satisfied that the specific demographic of highly educated Black Women on Threads was just eating it up and tearing it apart. 

But then, I couldn't stop thinking about it. 

And then, I tried to come up with a good metaphor about the situation, and the first one is the obvious one, the cliche :: 

Gerwig, having made a movie about the patriarchy, and then complaining that that same patriarchy does not reward her for her efforts (which is incorrect because the movie has been nominated, but I'll circle back to that one) is embodying the forewarning that one ought not "Bite the hand that feeds it." 

Gerwig took a tiny little stab at a group of people in power, and now she's pissed that she's not being patted on the head by this same group (even though she is)?

And now we've moved onto the next problem ::

It's an adapted screenplay because the character already existed and was created by someone else. 

Nobody would call a story about Frodo Baggins "original." So, like, go fuck yourself.

Next! ::

Gerwig took a tiny little stab at the patriarchy. Like so tiny that most of us women, those who've been traveling down this road a bit longer and with a little more gumption, were wholeheartedly disappointed by the soft-core nature of this not-so-ground-breaking work of women's empowerment, etc.

Instead of dragging Gerwig for simply not being as smart as we all wish she were, we should be glad that she's on her journey, and on this journey, she has decided to make big-budget entertainment for the masses about women. A lot of women do not even believe that the patriarchy is a bad thing for them. And so, after I was thoroughly depressed by Barbie for about three solid weeks, I am beginning to realize, now, that Gerwig has done us a tiny favor.

Yes, we can be disappointed that a prominent white woman still doesn't really get it, but she is getting it.

Overall, she's raised the cultural consciousness around "feminism" and what it means to be a "feminist" to a slightly higher given.

Would we save a lot of time by lifting more educated, more enlightened voices? Of course. Would it be even more valuable to hear diverse perspectives, especially when prominent Black Woman Voices are typically triply educated? Yes, absolutely.

Gerwig is who we've got, at the moment. Sure it'd be great if she were a bit smarter, but we don't need to honor or shame her.

And then the rub finally breaks the skin, and those little specks of blood begin to ooze from my pores ::

Why does she even care about being validated by the patriarchy itself? 

Why even legitimize the patriarchy by attending the Oscars, accepting the nominations she did receive? 

Why? 

Fraud.

Only a fraud would be so blinded by their own ego to mistake the message of their own movie. 

Only a fraud would make a movie about how terrible the patriarchy is and then beg and then subsequently bitch at that same patriarchy for an award. The behavior is so White it makes me sick.

And so, maybe the problem isn't the patriarchy. Maybe it's Whiteness.  

It's 'FREE MONEY'

When I was in college, I waited tables during the summer at a new fancy shmancy restaurant in my hometown. I had waited tables the summers before at a more local joint, but now I was old enough to serve alcohol. I would bank no less than $100 a night, and if a night was looking slow, like, I would not clear $100, I got cut, cause I never had to stay on a Monday, cause I was a weekend anchor. That shitty Monday shift was for the shittiest, laziest server of the bunch. 

I pulled doubles, regularly. So regularly, in fact, that I burnt myself out after working seven days a week for an entire month, doubles on the regular. Obviously, I had a breakdown and ended up in the owner/manager's office, and I've told this story before, but basically, she just asked me what the problem was, and I told her that she never gives me a day off, and she laughed. She laughed in my face, and said, "You never ask for days off." And I sniffled and wiped my tears, and was like, "What the fuck?" 

Anyway, she's one of my role models, and someday, I will be her. She is an unofficial official mentor of mine as I emailed her, not so long ago, and she replied with her phone number and a "call me," which I did. So, yea. She's my mentor, as well, to this day. 

Anyway, I would bring in big bucks at that restaurant. I would easily make $10K over the course of the three months between spring and fall semester, and then, I would live off of that money during school. 

I did this for two summers, and during the second summer, one of my coworkers, who worked there year-round, started treating me more like a coworker than a child. I was old enough to drink, now, lol. And it was during this summer that she started to become more of the owner/manager's Right Hand, and I smashed every weekend with her pulling doubles. We worked so well together, and we made some serious cash.

And then there was Thursdays? I can't remember which day, exactly, but there was this rich old man who would stroll into the restaurant every week on the same day of the week, and no matter what he ordered, he'd leave a $100 bill. Lunch would run him no more than twenty-five bucks, so that's that. Whoever got to be his server that day had their day shift made with just this one guy. So, we would trade. She was generous like that. She could've easily, easily, had that guy all to herself. She outranked me, and she out-aged me, but she was cool like that. She would give me a big top sometimes that I knew she wanted, but she would just give it to me every once in a while. Maybe she was just tired. Who knows. 

Anyway, it was this server who said the thing that changed my life, forever. FOREVER. 

One afternoon, we were just chatting, cause restaurants are typically slow between lunch and dinner, and so, there's some time to chat when you're setting up for dinner, etc. So, I just asked her some stuff about herself. She hailed from Bulgaria and was making a life for herself and her family in America. And she smiled, and she was so satisfied with her life, and she had just put 90% down on her first house, a house with TWO BEDROOMS! 

She was living the Dream. The American Dream. 

And I remember being so shocked by her love for America. There was so much possibility in her voice, in her outlook, in her life. She was so happy. She was working hard, and it was paying off. 

And then, she said it; she said the thing. She said, "FREE MONEY." And I was like, what? And she was like, this job is free money. And I was like, explain more, please, and she said,

"I come here, and I stand around, and I wait until someone comes to eat food. Then I bring them what they want to eat, and they leave money on the table. I go over there, and I pick up the FREE MONEY." 

The Balls We Carry [are not equal]

She's born

&for a little while

if she's lucky

someone carries her

literally

someone hosts her life

hopefully

and all she does is eat, sleep and poop

&then

one day

she is given a small beach-ball-type ball 

a responsibility

the responsibility of not-pooping herself

learning, remembering that she has to pee and poop in a toilet

and for the most part, the ball is not very heavy,

maybe at first

it's a bit awkward

but it is not difficult, per se

to bear the weight of potty training

&then

another responsibility becomes hers

and that ball grows

in its size, shape, and weight

but she's stronger now

and the size, shape, and weight

hopefully

grows at the same pace as her strength

&then

for some like her

the size and weight of the "next" ball

that she's given to bear

is much larger in size and weight

much more awkward in shape

especially when compared

to other balls that are being carried

by people of a similar age

&then

she

the one with the overly large, awkward and heavy ball

compared to her age

grows even stronger than the rest

develops skills to manage such a size, shape and weight

that some

will never be able to bear

&she

becomes destined for

GREATNESS

because the balls that she's carried

carries

are incomparable

in size, shape and weight

to the balls of others

&so the inevitable will 

unfold.

It is my truest hope. The only thing for which I've realized I am willing to live...YOU getting rich.

Privatization is Capitalism, just fyi.

It seems like this is a basic piece of financial literacy, that the "every person" seems like they simply do not understand, for reasons that are beyond me *sigh*

Thus, Capitalism-as-Usual is the privatization (in this so-called democracy, cause, like, places with mummies for monarchs have a different definition of "private," etc.) of any and everything so that a dollar can be made by someone through the idea of "private ownership."

[we're gonna make a quick detour here, cause, like, put the fucking punctuation inside the goddamn closing quotation mark, unless, the quote-un-quote quote is a literal quote, and always when the punctuation serves as the grammatical gateway back into the unquoted portions of your writing. gah.]

What does privatization look like? 

It looks like gutting taxpayer-funded healthcare services so that some asshole can own a hospital and then charge a "market price" for services related to healthcare. 

It looks like gutting taxpayer-funded schools in favor of charter schools so that some asshole can own a school and charge a "market price" for services related to education.

It looks like gutting taxpayer-funded housing in favor of home ownership so that all you assholes who want to own a house must buy and sell said house at a "market price" for something that resembles ownership but is more like a ponzy scheme. 

etc., etc., &c.

Capitalism is thusly fueled by Capital.

It begins with the fact that a group of rich women will have even more money if they pool their money together, toward one goal. Less individual risk, greater group reward.

Let's say I want to do something expensive. Just for the ease of math, let's say it costs $100. If I put in twenty-five buckaroos with three friends, then our loss potential is only $25, but we have a whole $100 to invest, so any amount that we profit is a win. And then we divvy up the cash equally, in this case.

So, all that the stock market is is a complex extension of this.

A company, when it reaches or surpasses a certain scale of profitability, "goes public," and makes itself available for people to "share" in future profits. If you buy a share, you own a portion of that company, and then when that company earns profits, the profits are considered to be earned by everyone who owns a share of the company, a slice of the pie, as it were, but we all know that the profits are earned by the people on the ground who do the day-in-day-out grunt jobs that make this fucking world go round. 

Most companies, these days, are owned by so many people that a handful of uber-wealthy groups own the majority of the 500, but that doesn't mean that you, yes, you, as a measly little hourly-wage earner, cannot also own some tiny fraction of a percent. You can, quite literally, make a few hundred dollars each year without doing anything at all, except investing some cash in companies listed on stock markets. 

It's all very possible, even for the ... less intelligent, which means that it's highly doable for any person of average intellect. You may not get like billionaire-level rich, like I will, but you CAN set yourself up nicely for the very expensive future, etc. 

Remember how like the Boomers got left behind and were forced out of their jobs a little too early because some of them were unable to keep up with the advancements of technology?

Well, that's what's going to happen to everyone who cannot figure out how to make money while they sleep. If you cannot navigate this New Age of Capitalism-as-Usual, you will not financially survive the very, very expensive future. There are not enough hours in a day to work hourly-wage labor and survive. 

I say this over and over again, and I will continue to say it over and over:

THE FUTURE IS GOING TO BE VERY EXPENSIVE

&THE FUTURE IS COMING AT ALL OF US

VERY, VERY FAST

I could talk about money all day, and I'm most easily available through Threads, Electronic Mail, and IG Live.

i HOPE you get rich.

January in forthcoming writings that may or may not come to fruition, because [i have this friend who says because like, becahwoose, through her delectable accent, and i love it, so that's always how i say it, in my head, only sometimes aloud], like, people change.

A List

☺ When considering what trait creates "The Many," it becomes abundantly clear that humanity—in all of its so-called intellectual capacity—has failed to understand that we are all humans, because, The Law must be put into words, and the definition of "human" cannot be summed up in words, alone, and yet, we, as a society, instead of bickering about how "unique" we are, are all just bags of bones, so why are we not fighting for humanity, us, ourselves, human life. Oh, cause we can't agree on the definition of "human"? Fuck you.

☺ The Balls We Carry

☺ I started waiting tables at a local joint with outdoor seating on an enormous patio overlooking the River, when I was seventeen, the summer before my junior year of high school, and worked there for two summers. And then I moved up in the world and waited tables at a fine-dining restaurant, again with an enormous outdoor dining space, less the River, during the summers between college semesters. And while working at the fine-dining place, I met a young woman (twenty-five at the time to my twenty) who put this whole jobbing thing into a perspective for me that not only changed my life at that time but also, that has guided me through my entire life, thus far.

☺ Taking Inventory

My Current Beauty Routine (named products included)

Maybe one other thing?

☺ I'd rather be shivved than sliced.

☺ On Being Antigone (metaphorically speaking)

☺ Becoming rich is not about hoarding cars or buying diamonds; it's about surviving the very near, very expensive future. Think about how everyone is already bitching about how expensive "the necessities" have become, and you can bitch about it as much as you want and complain about how it "shouldn't" be this way, or you can accept that change will not happen any time soon, that it must be forced through the sheer will and might of the "haves," and the only way to get the "haves" to care about the "have-nots" is to become a "have" who remembers what it was like to be a "have-not" and want to help as many as you can, and that's asking a lot, but the economic reality is that the majority of humans on this planet will not make it into the very expensive future, free, so your options are to keep on complaining as you spend yourself into the poor house or you can quit your bitching, put your head down and swim, swim hard and fast and don't stop until you reach economic freedom. I guarantee you, those who decide to do otherwise will not make it into the very near, very expensive future. 

☺

☺

2024 As a Reader

This year is going to look different from past years wherein I set a book goal and tried to read that many books over the course of a single calendar year, etc. 

This year, instead, I will study twelve books (one book per month, goddess willing *fingers crossed*), in a way that will hopefully make me deeply understand the knowledge within said books.

I have a short list, of six books, already, but I do not feel like sharing them at this time. If you see my threads on Threads, then you already know which books I will study for the first half of this year. That means that I will have six months to figure out which other six books I will do a deep dive on, etc.

At some point, I'm sure, I will touch upon the books I read this year. I simply do not know what that will look like at this time, the beginning of the year. 

Happy Reading ^..^

2023 The Complete List (of read & will-read books)

As a United Statesian taxpayer, I whole-heartedly utilize my local library. 

Books should absolutely be bought and paid for, 

but there's no need to not-read a book, because you cannot afford it. 

Your local library literally has a ... library ... full of books that are available to you, for FREE.

As a resident of Hawai'i, I use the Hawai'i State Public Library System

Click HERE for instructions on how to obtain your FREE library card!!!

^..^

Papyrus: The Invention of Books in the Ancient World by Irene Vallejo

The Power of Plus: Inside Fashion's Size-Inclusivity Revolution by Gianluca Russo

New Animal by Ella Baxter

Like, Comment, Subscribe: Inside YouTube's Chaotic Rise to World Domination by Mark Bergen 

Theories of International Politics and Zombies by Daniel W. Drezner

BITCH: on the female of the species by Lucy Cooke [must read]

Taste: A Book of Small Bites by Jehanne Dubrow

Catching the Light by Joy Harjo [must read]

In the Black Fantastic by Ekow Eshun

Salty: lessons on eating, drinking, and living from revolutionary women by Alissa Wilkinson 

you are not alone: the NAMI guide to navigating mental health by Ken Duckworth, MD

A Quantum Life: My unlikely journey from the street to the stars by Hakeem Oluseyi [must read]

Black Magic: Religion and the African American Conjuring Tradition by Yvonne Patricia Chireau

Three Journal Articles

Astrotopia: The Dangerous Religion of the Corporate Space Race by Mary-Jane Rubenstein

Hawaii's Royal History (New Revised Edition) by Helen Wong and Dr. Ann Rayson

Butts: A Backstory by Heather Radke [must read]

Where the Line Bleeds by Jesmyn Ward

Homie by Danez Smith

Felon by Reginald Dwayne Betts

My Nemesis by Charmaine Craig

Voyage of the Sable Venus and other poems by Robin Coste Lewis

Momfluenced: Inside the maddening, picture-perfect world of mommy influencer culture by Sara Petersen

Manse and Nono: Mama's Here by Shana K. Antoine illustrated by Larisa Lungu

Black Candle Women by Diane Marie Brown 

Fat Talk by Virginia Sole-Smith

We're All in This Together...: So Make Some Room by Tom Papa

Law 101: Everything You Need to Know About American Law by Jay M. Feinman

Zero to One: Notes on Startups, or How to Build the Future by Peter Thiel

Trail of Lightning by Rebecca Roanhorse

Fashion: From Concept to Consumer / Edition 9 [8th Edition] by Gini Stephens Frings

visit my "as a reader" page to read my 2024 reading situation, or don't *shrug*

Deja Me; Deja Vu

Here's the thing about orphans and "normal" people. Like, I don't really know where to begin, &I am not in the business of bashing young people, especially young women, but I do have a point to make. So, I'll say the thing, aloud, and then pick at it? 

Surviving orphanhood is a feat of the extraordinary.

When someone experiences a life of so much privilege that a feat of the extraordinary must be contrived in order to "feel something," that person should not be rewarded as having achieved some sort of "greatness." 

^..^

If you know to whom I refer, I will refrain from spelling it out. Because my point is not about the privileged so much as it is about "normal" people, in general, more broadly. 

Yes, everyone has their struggles. &Yes, not all struggles are created equal. &Yet for the person experiencing the struggle, struggle is relative. There's nothing more infuriating than the optimism of a white male who has never seen a day of True struggle. 

Nevertheless, there are some largely agreed-upon True struggles. &Orphanhood is one of them. &It should really be lumped in with childhood trauma. Any child who experiences any sort of trauma outside of the ordinary (pissing one's self is well within the range of "normal" trauma, imho) has seen True struggle. 

People who've survived any form of abuse, really. 

&In general, I cannot deny that every single person alive has, does, and will forever experience some form of trauma. If a person has, literally, not seen a lick of trauma, I do not want to meet that person. What a fucking worthless bag of bones. How could they possibly know anything about anything. ("Oh, no, Sun, nobody's worthless. You gotta stay out of that negative space," etc., etc., *barf* Some people are worthless. Like, it truly would've been better if they had not been born, etc., but yes, it's rare.)

Oh, so anyway, about orphans. 

My theory is that the age it is that you begin to experience trauma is the age at which you begin to understand something about the world that others may never have the chance to ever learn. Like, babies know who their mother is, facts. So even orphan babies internalize that something just isn't quite right. Orphans that are old enough to remember, thusly, sorta "know" that something is definitely not quite right. And then orphans who are fully cooked, I can only make assumptions, and I don't really do that.

I specialize in orphans who were old enough to remember but were not yet quite fully cooked, because, well, that's the type of orphan I am. 

Dammit. I don't really have much of an argument here, after re-reading what I wrote above not but moments ago. Ugh. 

My point was that I learned that I could teach myself things. I was thrust into a situation where I had to start figuring out stuff, real quick, all by myself. It's no wonder I excelled academically. I was Paying Attention. Like a soldier, I am only recently learning. I paid attention, because I had to. And that paying attention leads to vigilance, preparedness, making sure that the rug is never pulled out from under you cause you have a rug under that one and a rug under the one that's the rug under that one and so on and so forth.

^..^

I met my birth father's birth parents, my birth grandparents, when I was nineteen, and my birth grandfather was a military man. You should see these pics. When given one evening to hang out with me, he took me to see the Korean War Memorial or something, maybe it was like the Korean War History Museum, or something, but there were aircraft all over the "park." And you should see the way that he's standing in the pics that I have of the five of us. Cray.

Anyway, I was raised by him for the first three years and five months of my life. He named me. 

There's no way in all of eternity he did not instill in me my mindset to achieve in this life. No way. 

My adopted mother used to fret that I was "such a perfectionist," because I was trying to be "perfect," because I was afraid that I would be "sent back," etc. And honestly, this never felt like the Truth to me, because I didn't feel like a perfectionist, at the time. I got straight A's because I wanted them. That's a completely different mindset than needing straight A's to be accepted. And so, only recently, did I realize that I never had that fear. My adopted mother was very egotistical in accepting the one idea that was all about her. My perfectionism was never about her. It never has been, and it never will be. My adopted parents are far from perfectionist-types. I was never concerned about impressing them.

And it wasn't until I thought about those pics from that "park" with my birth family nineteen years ago that I realized that it was my birth grandfather who shaped my mindset about achieving, doing my best, working hard, in essence, he was the one who instilled DISCIPLINE in me, and I will be forever grateful.  

And I will forever be grateful for my adopted parents for raising me, caring for me and giving me the greatest chance at life from which anyone would've benefited greatly.

But this is not about that.

My point, ugh, again, is that orphans know True struggle. And the average "normal" person does not see struggle outside of the range of what would be considered "normal." And so, my argument is that orphans learn to teach themselves, early on, while "normal" people learn that you are taught what you need to know. 

And so, surviving childhood trauma means that there's massive potential for True Greatness to be had by the Orphan. Hence, the superhero orphan trope I hate so much, ugh. HATE. Because they get it wrong.

On the other hand, people who have so much privilege, excess, really, wherein they must contrive some sort of struggle to then "overcome," have not really accomplished much at all, in the way of greatness. They are simply meeting the bar, the standard, the top of the curve, what's considered, "normal." Cause in order to be "normal," one must experience some sort of struggle. That's normal. But that struggle is what would be considered well within the realm of "normal," nothing extraordinary. A few will never see struggle. And a few more will only see struggle. That's the curve. That's math, and humans cannot outrun math. 

And then, of course, mapping orphans will, inevitably, create yet another graph of normal distribution, cause it's turtles all the way down, duh.

^..^

I suppose that the kind of superhero I want to be is the kind that makes you realize that if you're no longer attending government-mandated school, and you are not continuing your education in "higher learning," you can fucking learn whatever the fuck you want about anything. Pick up a book and teach yourself something new. If you're too poor to buy a book, go to the public library. If you're so rich you buy all your books, buy a book for someone who needs it. Most people can teach themselves anything they want to learn. "Normal" people, unfortunately, learn that you must be taught in order to learn. That's the Truest crime against children that there is in these contemporary times, if you ask me. 

Be a Learner. Pick up a book. Watch an instructional video. Teach yourself something. You'll be amazed at what you can do.  

New Year's Day 2024

Happy 떡국* Day || here's hoping you get rich.

*떡국 kit provided by my new korean ko-jobber ^..^ Thank you! &the bodybuddy/lifemate and i added some 소고기 샤브, 만두, 봄양파 and 계란. Happy New Year! 맛있어요.